Lassie

Quentin Tarantino has always gone his own way. You've gotta appreciate the way he pretty much just makes movies for his own amusement, and then hopes that the American public will follow along. And if you wind up with a box office trainwreck like "Grindhouse", he'll just shrug it off because it was his masterpiece, and if the rest of us didn't like it, well, we just didn't get it.

Besides, "Reservoir Dogs" and "Pulp Fiction" will cover a multitude of sins for a good long time, and most of the film industry still thinks he's a genius, so he's going to be in business for a good long time. But whenever you read a story like this one, it makes you wonder if he isn't speeding toward his decline just a little too quickly.

That's right fans, Brittany Spears may be coming to a theatre near you as a feature actress in Tarantino's latest Hollywood remake. Remaking a movie? Well, yes, but possibly making over your favorite starlet-turned-punchline into more than just an easy target for E! headlines. So just how much do you trust your favorite noir director now?

Can it get any better? Of course it can! It's time for a feel-good remake of the classic Lassie, I'm thinking starring Michael Vick. Or a touchy-feely movie about building lasting family relationships... I'd wanna cast Liza Minelli and Lou Diamond Phillips for this one. And finally, a firm message movie about the dangers of substance abuse, with Lindsay Lohan and Owen Wilson.

Don't forget a public service ad for traffic safety.... Paris Hilton will be perfect!!